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Notes on Love and Hate

1. Love is not blind but infatuation is. Hate is not blind but anger is (Heidegger). Love and hate, as I had guessed before, gather one's self in a resolve with an intention which is beyond good and evil. Sometimes, as I have experienced, hate welds you stronger to yourself than love does. This explains for the intricacies and singularity of purpose in revenge. Hate is not yet madness and nor is love. Anger and infatuation are the forms of true mania. In mania, one becomes "beside himself" as one is "seized" or "overcome" by something (strong emotions, affects, subconscious, trauma, etc.). And this is the danger because what has hitherto gathered one's self is unleashed unto the object of passion for worse (even if the thought intention was for the good). Because of this transference of control unto the object of passion, being beside himself, one is not able to see with his own eyes reality anymore: what he sees is a fractured reality. The object overcomes the person and turns into an obsession until finally the person is totally led out of himself and his mind. Thus the possibility of being blind.

2. Love is not blind in the other, less serious sense, that in reality one cannot but see clearly when one is in love. Or better: one cannot but see what can otherwise not be seen in the other. The lover sees in the beloved "something" which is no longer a thing--this or that characteristic, this or that possibility of heightened experiences, etc. (Pascal's paradox: When I love the other because of this or that then I love this or that and not her). That "something"--ineffable, unexplainable and finally without reason--is what fixes the heart (and no longer the mind and the sense) to the beloved. Marion would say that that "something" is the experience of finally being-seen or, which comes to the same thing, finally loving first. And this mutual experience or non-experience of being-seen and being-loved seals two lovers in a loving which has no visible object (no reason or no explanation). (When I am asked, "Why do you love her?", any reason I give will undermine my real love for her. This is why we say, "I do not know why but I do." Eckhart will say that love is its own ground so that love loves because it loves). Lovers see "why"--and nothing could be clearer for them. Others will never see why. Love is blind for those who are not the lovers.

3. Hate is the worm in one's heart. But as such a worm, it also cleanses the heart in that it is the way in which the heart is cleaned of residues of anger. (Worms are used to sanitize wounds from bacteria. The worm itself cannot kill you but bacteria can). A man of hate is never dangerous by himself. True, hate may slowly consume him bit by bit as a worm consumes a fruit slowly; but with this "slow death" comes the possibility as well of recovery and forgiveness--the end and reversal of hate. This is why hate takes its time. What is thus dangerous is the fatal mixture of hate and anger at the right time. Anger, as passion or affect, feeds on the reason and logic of hate in much the same way that action is in-formed and fueled by reason. The dangerous man is the one who is not only willing and capable of an act of anger but is also so de-termined by a motive (reason) which cannot be doubted (by himself) anymore (because it has always been there). Hate is the motive but by itself as motive it cannot do harm on the object of hate. The will of anger is the agent that precipitates the the now unhindered gravity of hate. And the trick of anger is that it hides itself behind the fuel of hate, thus, totally exposing the person to culpability. This is why theoretically, "crimes of passion"--of anger--are "lighter" than premeditated crimes (which presume reason, and thus, hate). It may also be said that suicide is the act by which man's anger (not necessarily on himself) overcomes his self (necessarily)-hate.


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